The Alice

I promise that I will no longer be that smug new mummy, the one who has the perfect baby who sleeps and eats when she should. I say this because Elfreda has been awake since 11am and is now completely overtired. It’s 9pm and she’s been screaming since 6 – I am writing this as her Dad has taken her out for a drive in a last-ditch attempt for sleep.

The last week has been very tough for all three of us. I can see Elfie growing in so many ways, and it seems to me that she is now clever enough to want to be doing things but lacks the motor skills and co-ordination. I think a fair amount of her grizzling this week (and there has been A LOT) has been the consequence of frustration. I know this is a stage and it will pass but it’s difficult to remind myself of this after 4 hours of wailing when all I want to do is relax in front of the TV with a glass of wine.

To try and overcome the six-week blues I plan to get out and about; Elfie had her best nights sleep last week after accompanying us to a rugby match so lots of fresh air is on the agenda. I will be attending my first Mother and Babies group on Monday, a day at the farm on Tuesday and an arts workshop on Thursday. The baby is far to young of course to take part in any of these activities but I’m hoping to make some new friends and get her used to different activities.

Originally posted at mumplusone.

I am hungover. In the last 48 hours I have had a pounding headache, felt like something has died in my mouth and have thrown up more times than I care to remember (muslin cloths work for grown-up ills, too).

Our friends got married on Saturday afternoon and had the most fantastic wedding. They wed in a small ceremony at the town hall then a party followed at a private member’s club. As they’re both rockers there was a skull and crossbones theme and, crucially for my heaving head, an all-day free bar. Dangerous. The bride fantastically wore black Jenny Packham and some of my very favourite friends were in attendance.

Previously to this, the last night out I had was Halloween 2009. I was a two-week pregnant spooky Amy Winehouse and I celebrated with a big group of friends in a Shoreditch bar (sidenote: I’m not sure why, but dressing up seems to cease being fun at around 15, but as soon as you hit your mid 20’s it becomes fun again… weird). I hired a beehive wig, bought a Winehouse tattoo set online and even wore ballet shoes… read the rest of this post at my mumplusone blog.

Hopefully a ‘real’ smile won’t be far off…

You may have noticed that I’m a bit of a Tommee Tippee fan. As we’re combination feeding Elfie I wanted to make sure we minimised any nipple confusion, and after extensive online research TT’s Closer to Nature bottles seemed to be the most recommended. I’ve been really pleased with the bottles as well as the dummy I’ve recently introduced; Elfie feeds well from them and still latches on to the boob beautifully.

I was pleased to be contacted by Tommee Tippee recently and they kindly sent me their Closer to Nature Electric Breast Pump to try. I’d been using a Philips Avent manual pump but as I was expressing twice a day the process had become fairly laborious – an electric pump seemed like the perfect way to save my poor right hand.

Pros:

I was firstly surprised at how small the pump was – there didn’t seem to be that many parts and once I’d understood the instructions assembly was very easy. It was also simple to disassemble and sterilise, I loved the sterilising box that came with the pump and it was the perfect size to use when we were away from home last weekend.

The pump also comes with a bottle, 2 milk storage containers and breast pads. The breastpads are bigger than others I’ve tried but the most comfortable.

I had some concerns with the mechanism of the pump as my midwife taught me how to express in a particular way to encourage the maximum amount of milk (pumping at different speeds to encourage letdown, simulating baby). I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to do this with the electric pump but I was happily surprised at the different speeds I was able to select; light, low, medium and high. This gave me a great deal of control over the way in which I was expressing – great, as I know what works best for me.

The buttons on the controller were really self-explanatory, meaning the pump was very easy to use once assembled.

The pump expresses directly into Tommee Tippee bottles, meaning I simply popped the milk in the fridge ready for feeding.

Cons:

The instructions to the pump were quite daunting at first, the writing was small and I was quite baffled by the diagram. This I would say is most probably a failing on my part; I can’t put together flat-pack furniture and am useless with a map, I’m simply not very practical. Once I’d wrapped my head around the instructions I was able to assemble the pump with ease though I was initially worried I wouldn’t be able do it myself!

One reason I enjoy using my Avent pump is the fact it’s clear; I can see the milk when I’m expressing so I know when I’ve finished and can tell how much milk is coming out. I found the opaqueness of the Tommee Tippee pump was a real disadvantage. There was no way to know when I was finished expressing so I had to keep removing the pump to check.

The milk storage containers – not big enough!

Price:

At £84.99 the pump is fairly pricey (though I believe comparable to others on the market). You can currently get 15% off this at TommeeTippee.co.uk.

Overall, I would recommend this pump. It’s working really well for my combination feeding and it’s easier to use twice a day at home in comparison to my manual pump, which I will save for when I’m staying away. Thumbs up from me.

…and what have I learned?

I now know how to change a nappy in 30 seconds – something I’d never done before baby Elfie came along. I know that it’s a lot easier to get up after only 4 hours sleep if you didn’t have 8 shots of sambucca the night before. I know that non-maternity jeans are actually fairly uncomfortable and if I had it my way I would wear soft jersey 24/7 (but I like clothes to much to do this). I know it’s bloody hard work to look after a baby, house and husband, and how do mothers of twins do it? (Young Mummy, I’m looking at you. You are my absolute hero). I know there’s always washing, housework, baby entertainment or cooking to be done. I know that being a stay-at-home mum is the hardest job I’ve ever had!

I also know how wonderful it is to see Elfie come on every day, how proud I felt when she woke only once in the night instead ofher usual twice (she hasn’t done this since, unfortunately). It’s amazing to watch her eyes take in the world around her, to be the one who gives her baths when she stops screaming and starts loving splashing around in the water. I can tell she’s just about to smile for real – we have lots of sleep and fart smiles so I’m sure this is just around the corner.

I’ve learned I miss work a lot more than I ever expected – ridiculously I miss the feeling of making a difference, of being ’important’ in the work world. I’ve missed all the festivals – Field Day, where I was really looking forward to Phoenix, and Will’s first solo event. I’ll miss London Fashion Week again this year (I missed the last one as I was suffering pregnancy-induced exhaustion) and I’m still getting email invites to lots of fantastic parties that I’m unable to attend.

However, most importantly I’ve learned that right now I wouldn’t change a thing.

…we went to a wedding, staying one night in a hotel and two with my mum and dad.

Elfreda looked gorgeous:

Until she poo’ed on her beautiful dress. I loaned her my fascinator to detract from the fact she’d changed into a babygrow:

She was doted on by Great Aunts and Uncles, second Cousins, Grandparents and most importantly her Uncle Josh:

Her Grandpa wore a fantastic Dickie Bow:

And with all the attention being lavished on the baby, Mum and Dad had a chance to have a drink (or 8):

In summary, we all had a very very good time and Elfie was the model baby:

Read my most recent blog post at mumplusone here.

We’ve been introduced to posseting; Elfie has a habit of taking down way too much milk and then scaring us by throwing up. All I can say is she is a true Harold family member if she’s a fan of overeating!

At her weigh-in today she’d put on weight, fabulous news! She’s 3 oz up and has about another 6 to go to get back to her birth weight. Hopefully at her next check on Wednesday she’ll get discharged by the Midwives.

Elfie is so much more alert now and really enjoys gazing at us, the wall, the window… she’s gradually spending more and more time awake during the day and it’s amazing seeing her notice more things on a daily basis.

Her nappies have this week become proper baby nappies! They smell like a mix between vomit and poo and have the consistency and colour of a korma. Delightful. I am so lucky as daddy doesn’t mind changing nappies at all (he probably does it more than me).

Elfie still doesn’t fit into her newborn clothing so Grannie kindly bought her some lovely new tiny sleepsuits. They’re purple, very refreshing as she has way too many pink things.

She was introduced to her first pub yesterday – we had lunch with my parents and brother for my birthday. She was an absolute star and slept through the whole thing, I’ll be going back to the pub next week for their mother and baby group.

She’s tending to wake up just 2 or 3 times in the night, at around midnight, 2.30 and 5.30. I’m thinking this is fairly good! We will be trying to implement some routines shortly based on Gina Ford’s Contented Baby books but not until she gets to six weeks or so. Right now the priority is giving her lots of love and food.

I’m desperate to be up and about doing things and it’s really frustrating to take it so easy. I want to be driving, exercising, (shopping), even working! We went into town last week to introduce Elfie to TopShop and Gap but my nipples leaked in Office and I got tired so we had to come home. It was an interesting experience!

Weight loss post-birth is now at 1st 11lbs. I have 1st to lose before getting back to my pre-birth weight but I’m not rushing it.

Breastfeeding: hard work for something that’s supposed to be the most natural thing in the world!

After thinking it was all going swimmingly in the hospital and then developing cracked, bleeding nipples from hell, we finally got some help from the scary midwife who carried out our home visit last monday. Since then it’s been a completely different experience and I no longer feel like I want to cry every time she latches on. Honestly, the pain I was experiencing was how I imagine it to feel if I were to rub my nipples up against broken glass.

We’ve had other feeding issues in that Elfreda often drops off to sleep within five minutes of being on the boob, if not sooner. We’ve tried a million different ways to stop her doing this but it seems she just finds breastfeeding so soporific and comforting, there’s just no stopping her. This is especially frustrating in her late evening feed when she drops off after being fed for 5 minutes, I wind and put her down and then she wakes up in a cold bed crying for more milk. Repeat 5-6 times before she’s full enough to drop off and you have one tired mummy.

She is slowly getting better at staying awake for her feeds and I know it’ll be easier for her as she’s bigger, but I worry that she’s not getting sufficient calories as she is still 8 oz under her birth weight. I’m pumping the remainder of the milk she leaves to bottle feed her when she wakes back up and we’re using formula for one of her feeds so fingers crossed at her weigh-in today she will have put on a little weight.

Anyway, I’m glad we’ve found a feeding routine that almost seems to be working for us. I’m pleased with our decision to introduce the bottle at this early stage, she has no issue with switching between that and the boob and the fact that we give one formula feed a day gives me the flexibility to have a nap and leave baby with Will or feed from a bottle when we’re out. The scary midwife from last week was very militant about breastfeeding 100% of the time, but our usual midwife is happy with our current arrangement. It takes that little bit of pressure off me and means I’m not stressed – happy me, happy baby.