The Alice

- I’m feeling really great after the C section – so much better than I expected. I’m trying not to let this lull me into a false sense of security and go mad with the housework but am really pleased I can do bits and pieces around the house still. I didn’t even feel the staples come out of the section incision on day 5 (15 of them in total!) and have cut down to 2 lots of painkillers a day.

- Being a Mum is harder yet easier than I imagined. I am exhausted (I imagine this is as I recover from the caesarian) which makes things tough but feeding and changing her is such a pleasure.

- Elfie sleeps A LOT. I’d estimate around 21-22 hours a day. I’m jealous. We’re lucky that she goes down for the night with us at about 11, sleeps through until a feed and change at about 3.30, and then back down til 7. What a good baby. I wonder how long it will last?

- She only likes to sleep on her side in her cot all scrunched up, very cute but it means her nappies leak… we’ve had to do a couple of 4am sheet changes.

- She loves eating and now we’ve resolved our breastfeeding issues she’s doing it about six times a day. I’m expressing one feed a day so daddy can get involved too; Tommee Tippee bottles have been brilliant and there’s no boob/bottle confusion whatsoever.

- Her belly button stump fell off today!

- She’s still so tiny that she doesn’t fit into newborn sized clothing. Will bought some ‘tiny baby’ sized babygros to see us through but they’re still big on her and we need to roll up the sleeves. The legs on them flap around like flags in the wind. Very sweet but I hope she fits into the lovely outfit we have for my cousin’s wedding in a couple of weeks (size newborn).

- She had lost 9 ozs at her check on Monday – they were fairly happy with this but we will get re-checked on Friday.

- I can’t wait to be all better and be able to drive again – I miss shopping! I miss restaurants! I miss the supermarket! Really looking forward to getting out and about with our little girl.

When I first found out I was pregnant and started writing my blog, the ‘Birth Story’ post was the one I was looking forward to writing the most. I imagined it would involve a birthing pool, a bit of hypnobirthing and if I’m honest a good old measure of pain relief. But we know that wasn’t the birth I was to have, so really my birth story began 2 weeks before the 7th July when I found out I would be having a C Section.

I was convinced I wouldn’t go the 2 week stretch without going into labour naturally so spent the majority of that time feeling horrendously paranoid about every twinge and pain. It was nice to have that time to prepare for the baby, and I tried to get ready for baby’s arrival as much as possible by relaxing and cleaning the house.

The night of the 6th July we prepared our bedroom by getting baby’s cot ready; we’re using a BedNest co-sleeper. I didn’t sleep that much and we were up at 6am the next morning, ready to have a baby.

We got to the hospital for 7.30am and were shown our bed at 8.30. It was a 2 person ward but I would have it to myself. We were booked in for the second caesarian of the day and they estimated we’d be going down at around 11am. Time for one last bump photo!

I got given some SEXY support stockings that were to be the worst thing ever on the hottest day of the year…

I actually liked the hospital nighty I was given; it matched my dressing gown!

There was an emergency caesarian happening between c section number one and me so we had to wait longer than expected. Initially I was very frustrated at the long wait but then hunger took over (I hadn’t eaten since 10pm the night before and was nil by mouth) and it really helped take my mind off the wait. After having a final scan to confirm baby was still bum-down we were finally taken down to theatre at 1pm.

I walked myself in to theatre (which I wasn’t expecting!) and Will changed into scrubs whilst I got an IV line in my hand (ouch!). I was super paranoid that they would forget the local anaesthetic before my spinal and I remember reminding both anaesthesiologists quite a few times… I’m sure they loved me for that. I got attached to what felt like a million machines and the spinal was working within minutes. It was the most bizarre feeling, my bum went all hot before my legs started tingling and then went very heavy and numb. They rotated me round onto the bed quicksharp, laid me back and tilted me slightly to the left to take the pressure off my major veins before putting in a catheter. They tested my numbness with a very cold spray before beginning the operation.

I remember them breaking my waters and sucking them out as I asked if somebody was blowing their nose over the operation… it seems that when I’m nervous my sense of humour gets cranked up a notch (not necessarily a good thing).

After 10 minutes of what felt like a very vigorous tummy massage Elfreda Daphne was born (1.35pm) – feet first through the sunroof which Will said was a very bizarre sight to behold. It took her a minute or so to cry and it was wonderful when I heard her. Will trimmed the cord and took video of the midwife doing her initial checks before she was brought to me for photos and kisses.

I couldn’t believe that such a gorgeous little thing was mine, the feeling was so strange. I really couldn’t marry together the fact that before I was pregnant and now there was a baby, and the baby had come from me.

More photos were taken by the wonderful anaesthesiologist and midwife, who were both fantastic the whole way through and really made what could have been a horrible experience wonderful.

Then Elfie was weighed, a petite 6lbs 14oz, 1 oz less than me at birth and the exact same weight as her Uncle Josh.

She pinked up beautifully and had an APGAR score of 8 at one minute and 10 at 5 and 10 minutes.

They put a ridiculously massive terrycloth nappy on her and wrapped her in a blanket.

Meanwhile, I was being stitched up and was very impatient to hold her – Will was busy having lots of cuddles and I was jealous! I asked the midwife repeatedly how long was left. The feeling of my staples going in (15 in total) was a weird one and I was so relieved when this was over and I was transferred back onto a bed so I could finally cuddle my baby. Will was sent away to get changed back into his clothes and we were wheeled through to recovery.

Elfie was sucking her thumb before we got out of the operating theatre, and latched on as soon as we were in recovery. She just LOVES breastfeeding which has been fabulous for the most part.

We were feeding in recovery and having observations taken for around half an hour before being transferred back up to the ward. My mum, dad and brother came for a really quick visit about an hour later before leaving us to get to know each other as a family of three.

We were transferred to a private room the next day and stayed one more night, I was desperate to get home with Will and Elfie really didn’t enjoy sleeping in the hospital crib and would wail every time she was put in it (lots of sleepless fun for mummy…).

She was given her first bath!

And her Grannie H came for a visit.

At home she is fairly chilled out and happy: she still likes breastfeeding a lot but after being in a lot of nipple pain for a couple of days we’ve found out her latch is not quite right. I’m a bit disappointed as I asked the latch to be checked in hospital and again in my first home visit and was told we were feeding perfectly. But at my second home visit today the midwife gave us a real lesson in breastfeeding and it seems her attachment is a bit too shallow. This afternoon we’ve made changes and I can tell it’s getting better but we’ve already given her a couple of lots of formula over the last three days as my nipples have been way too painful to feed from in the evenings. I knew breastfeeding could be tough but I really didn’t realise it would be so painful and by using formula I’ve felt like I’ve let her down. I’ll be working really hard over the next few days to make sure she gets what she needs from me and we’ve been taught a couple of pumping techniques to help. We WILL master breastfeeding!

I’m trying to remember that I’ve had a major operation and need to relax but it’s difficult as it feels like there’s so much that needs doing. I’ve been making sure I take a nap with the baby in the afternoon to get extra sleep though she’s only waking up once in the night at the moment for a feed and change, long may it last.

Baby Elfreda Daphne H (named after two of her Great-Grandmothers) was born on July 7th at 1.35pm weighing 6lbs 14oz. We had a couple of sleepless nights in hospital as she decided she was so good at breastfeeding she wanted to do that instead of sleep and she HATED the hospital crib. We came home at 5pm yesterday and she’s been very relaxed ever since – feeding and snoozing. We have been mostly staring at her in awe of how we possibly made something so gorgeous.

The Caesarian section was scary as I thought it would be but the staff at the hospital could not have been more wonderful. I am so glad we were able to go through our birthing experience there instead of London.

More photos to follow I’m sure once I’ve caught up on sleep.

I write this on my last day as a childless person. The last day Will and I are a couple, rather than a family of three. It’s been a weird day.

Tomorrow we will be arriving at the hospital at 7.30am to book onto the post-natal ward, and then we will relax for a couple of hours before my caesarian section. We’re second on the list so I’m hoping we won’t be left hanging too long.

I am ending this pregnancy at 11 stone and 11 lbs, having started it at 9st 2 lbs. I’m in a different city and Will is in a totally different situation work-wise. We’ve had the worst scenarios thrown at us in the last nine months, and have ended up in a place I never thought we’d be. Yet our future looks even more promising than I had hoped and bar my hormones and the stresses of starting a new business we are very happy.

I want to say thank you so much to the friends I have made through this blog since October – I have had such great support from you all and I’ve appreciated each and every email and comment. Though I didn’t get to hang out with you all at CyberMummy this year there is always next.

I will be back in a few days with baby, and the next chapter will begin.

- Greys Anatomy has been my saviour from Maternity Leave boredom this week. I love it – LOVE IT! Unfortunately it’s a bit of a ritual that Will and I watch it together at the end of a long day, but to his dismay I can’t wait for him any longer. So I’m averaging 4 episodes a day and am currently whizzing through season 5, whereas Will is stuck at the start of season 4. Barring Desperate Housewives it’s my favourite show and it is the reason Will is looking forward to scrubbing in for real at my caesarian. I am really jealous that he’ll get to wear scrubs…

- I have never had Acid Reflux before in my whole life but it turns out that’s what the weird feeling in my throat is. I’ve had it a few times over the last fortnight and thought it might have been something to do with the fact I’m still averaging 2 bags of ice a week, but after a nasty 12 hours of near-vomiting and a Google of my symptoms I have discovered I have the reflux. And reflux sucks.

- I’m tired. I feel like I will always be tired. It doesn’t help when people say “make the most of your sleep, it’ll be a distant memory soon, hur hur hur”.

- On that note, the unsolicited advice I seem to be receiving off anyone and everyone was fine at first – almost welcome. But now I’m hot, tired, and uncomfortable I’m feeling pretty antisocial and just would like people to back off. My body, my baby. Get lost*

- While we’re at it, don’t touch the belly. It’s especially annoying if I don’t know you.

- We bought a car! A fairly new Renault Laguna, nice and safe for baby. However, what initially seemed to be a great bargain from the car auction turned out to be a bit of a money drain to get it into shape (£600 garage bill, £135 for 6 months tax… ouch). I need to keep reminding myself that between us Will and I used to spend £260 a month on public transport in London, not including taxis, so in the big scheme of things it’ll work itself out. And it feels brilliant to be able to hop in the car whenever we like… especially as it’s a fancy automatic.

- I’m still having contractions on and off, not enough to get excited about but enough to make me go “oof” occasionally.

- I’ve given up on my swollen hands and taken my rings off, they were getting uncomfortably tight. I can still wear my wedding ring on a chain around my neck but I’m looking forward to getting both rings back on my finger where they belong.

- Similarly, I’ve given up on wearing anything that isn’t stretchy as even my arms and legs are swelling up in this heat. I can’t get either pair of my maternity jeans over my calves without wincing so it’s jersey only.

- Make-up is also a thing of the past. Who can be bothered in this heat? Ditto contact lenses.

- We’re definitely going to have a baby this week. How crazy is that?

* of course I am far too polite to say any of this in real life and instead choose to seethe inwardly at all the ‘helpful’ comments I’ve been receiving..

You can see my most recent post now on mumplusone, where I write about my birth plans and baby being breech.

You might have noticed that this weekend I am on my computer at home catching up on blogging instead of at the inaugural CyberMummy event with the rest of the Huggies Mummybloggers.

When Huggies invited me to the event with them months ago I was feeling like a pregnancy superhero; I was working and socialising and more importantly Baby H was behaving herself. We lived in London and despite knowing I’d be almost 39 weeks pregnant I thought a day out would not only be do-able, it’d be welcome. Silly Alice!

Fast forward to now and our situation is totally different. I thought long and hard about the decision not to go, but I had to think of the worst scenario which would be going into labour and being a long tube and train ride away from home. Because of Baby H’s position we are under hugely strict instructions to make our way to hospital ASAP as soon as I feel the slightest rumble in my uterus and there are all sorts of nasty complications (cord prolapse – yikes) that could happen if we don’t get there in good time.

Were I still in London and if Baby H was head down as she should be I would have been there with bells on, but as it is I simply can’t risk it.

So that is why you will find me napping and typing today, instead of gassing and tweeting. I hope you’re all having a ball and I will be there next year without fail!

In the meantime, you can see the event being liveblogged at the CyberMummy blog, or visit my lovely fellow mummybloggers:

- Me, The Man and The Baby
- Baby Genie
- Glowstars
- Young and Younger
- A Place Of My Own
- A Mothers Ramblings
- Perfectly Happy Mum
- WAHM-BAM

Here I was three weeks ago on my last day of work. To me the exhaustion on my face from that week of packing and saying goodbye is obvious – at that point I remember just wanting to crawl back into bed. Instead, we moved house.

I had to share a photograph of my packed hospital bags after seeing this post by the lovely Notes To Self, Plus Two who was 40 weeks on Friday.

(Baby’s birth calls for posh luggage, I feel. Though there is too much stuff in the weekend bag and I can’t get the damned zip to close)

I’ve been having an almost-break from the internet to lie around the house in my underwear crunching on ice and clean like a madwoman (I don’t think it’s nesting – it’s just me enjoying my cleaning). Sky have been worse than dire at getting our broadband up and running in our new house and as we now rely on the income that comes from Will’s online activities he gets dibs on our mobile dongle. I don’t think it’s fair, either.

I’ve also been moonlighting for another blog in my precious internet time. Mum Plus One, the website that accompanies the magazine you can pick up in all good hospital waiting rooms among other places, asked me to become their pregnancy and first time mum columnist and I was only too happy to oblige. I’ve written two blogs for them so far, one where I discussed how weird it is that someone will soon be calling me ‘Mum’ and another where I wondered if moving across the country at 36 weeks pregnant was really the worst idea ever (answer: yes and never again). So go and check them out immediately!

In other news: I AM HOT.