The Alice

Yuck, I woke up at 5am this morning with a migraine and it has not let up all day. Yet another thing I can blame my hormones on; I had a couple of migraines when I was undergoing Prostap hormone treatment for endometriosis a few years ago and haven’t had one since then. Fingers crossed they’re not back for good.

One highlight of the day was that a pack of baby clothes I ordered from eBay came! I’ve discovered these ‘baby bundles’ you can buy – such bargains. 30 items for £9 inc p+p? Yes please. They are all lovely quality and I will be trawling eBay for more bargains in the coming months.

Mum also took a trip to her local NCT nearly new sale today for some bargains (like Mother like Daughter) and found Childbirth Without Fear for 50p, as well as a couple of toys. So in terms of baby H accumulating more things, it’s been a good day.

I’m trying very hard to get over my money worries. I think the issue is that I want to be able to spend the absolute maximum time with our baby without feeling the pressure to have to go back to work. I would rather not go back to working in an office at all and have been looking into freelance options so I can be WAHM, but what if nobody wants me and I don’t have a choice? I’m sure this won’t be the case but going from having a dual income to relying on one salary will be a massive shock to the system. About a year ago we reached a point when we’d paid off the majority of our debts and were able to live without money worries, it feels very strange to almost go back in time finance-wise.

Plus, I’ve been working for the last 7 years. How will I deal with losing such a big part of my life?

Anyway, I know I need to suck it up and get over myself. People raise children on a lot less money than we have, we are lucky to have a safe home, great friends and a wonderful family; we will never go hungry, cold or unloved and I need to stop my whinging!

Having spent the day in bed feeling sorry for myself I really wanted comfort food. Will’s working this evening so I needed something easy, and something that can be re-heated when he gets home at 6am. Macaroni Cheese had popped in my head earlier on in the day – I know it’s not the best diet food but it’s definitely delicious, and hey, I’m eating for 2! I use a roux-based cheese sauce and if I’m feeling virtuous I add tomato slices on top before baking, or even breadcrumbs for a bit of extra crunch:

Comforting Macaroni Cheese

25g butter
2 tbsp plain flour
250g grated cheddar cheese
300ml milk
250g macaroni pasta
300g bacon, pancetta or lardons
salt and pepper

Fry off the bacon until golden in a frying pan and drain on kitchen paper. Put to one side.

Cook the macaroni until al dente.

Melt butter in a large heavy-bottomed saucepan over a gentle heat.

When it’s liquid, add the flour and stir in well. Add 1/3 of the cheese and 1/3 of the milk and stir in until melted and blended.

Add the rest of the cheese and milk bit by bit, reserving a small amount of the cheese to put on top before oven baking.

When it’s a smooth sauce, add the macaroni pasta and bacon. Pour into an oven dish and sprinkle the reserved cheese on top.

Bake in an oven at 180 degrees C for about 12 mins, or until crunchy on top.

PS: Having had a bit of an issue with comments on my blog lately, I’ve upgraded my Wordpress installation so hopefully this should have fixed the problem. Feel free to email me if you’re still experiencing an error message – alice at thealice dot co dot uk.

One thing that has been a big shock to the system recently: PREGNANCY IS EXPENSIVE. In an ideal world, we’d planned to have been married 2-3 years and have saved up a nice little wad of cash before we became pregnant, but due to my supposed fertility issues (apparently not such an issue anymore, but that’s a whole other post) and our ‘what will be will be’ attitude, this wasn’t to be for us.

So far, we have spent a fair bit of money on:
- Ante-natal vitamins – Pregnacare, whilst they were the most expensive brand, seemed to be the best
- Maternity clothing – I have been LIVING in maternity leggings, nothing else will do at the moment. And I bought my first maternity bra at the Baby Show… that was expensive, nearly as much as my Rigby and Peller birthday undies
- Travel to and from the hospital – I’m going on average twice a month
- Furniture for the nursery – I’ve been lucky and found some bargains on eBay, but there are some things (cot mattress etc) that you really do need as new
- Baby clothes – why are so many baby items the same price as adult items when they’re a tenth of the size? One of life’s great mysteries I guess
- Pregnancy books – I like reading, I like to be informed, I do not like how expensive pregnancy books are!
- Food – I’m hungry, need the good stuff, enough said

… and I’m not even a quarter of the way into my ‘baby essentials’ purchasing list.

Factor in a trip in May to see the in-laws in Greece so they can see the baby bump for themselves before my July due date, a house move and all the fun money-spending things that come with living in London, and you’ve got yourself a couple of expectant parents with empty pockets. Plus we want to save up for a car as we sold ours when we moved down to London two years ago, and the situation isn’t helped by my expensive tastes…

It’s come to the time to decide what ante-natal classes we want to take. Throughout this pregnancy (and before, if I’m honest) I’ve always considered myself to be fairly well-read on the subject of pregnancy, birth and beyond; I don’t like surprises and I’m adamant that there won’t be any when I’m in labour so I’ve educated myself on every single outcome and possibility during this process. I’ve devoured pregnancy books, magazines, TV shows, YouTube clips…

At 7 weeks pregnant I pre-registered myself with my local NCT and selected to attend their standard ante-natal class, however when I received information on the course I felt I knew it all, and there was nothing new there for me. The problem is, every mum I know has cited NCT classes as essential for getting to know new mums – even Jools Oliver waxes lyrical about it in her 0-9 months baby book (hormones drove me to make some bad book choices…). If I choose not to go to classes will I be massively missing out? I know as a younger mum in a new area I’m going to find it challenging to make new friends, but what if I do choose to go to the classes and make no friends at all? Then I’m out of £280 and no better off. Mellow Mummy discusses this more eloquently than I do at her post ‘NCT: An Expensive Introductions Agency?‘

One thing I am certain on is that I want to use the hypnobirthing method during my labour and delivery. And hey, guess what? More money. I looked into doing a course but all local to me were around £350-400 so I’ve decided to do a home study course instead. And here’s somewhere I can save money! I’m going to buy the book off Amazon (along with Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth which I have heard brilliant things about), and couple that with Dany Griffiths’s Tums2Mums Hypnotherapy MP3s. She’s running a competition on her blog at the moment where you can win one of her Home Study courses – go here to enter as I have done.

I would love to hear from mums who have been through all this and can give me some advice on a) how to save a bit of money, and b) how to stop worrying about it. Help!

NB: please come back in 9 months time for the inevitable ‘Boy, aren’t babies expensive?!’ post, and if anyone needs a soon-to-be-mummy friend in the N10/N22 area, I’m on the market!

Picture credit: me, from back when I worked in the corporate world and could afford to flash my cash on frivolities such as work roulette nights…